2005 A Year in Review

I saw this post on Thermagal's Temperate Mumblings who saw it on Whiz's Blog.....

Instructions: take the first post from each month of 2005 and post a line or two.

January: Armed for 2005 (referring to the Mirabilia Cherub).

This was my first happy dance of the year.

February: What Planet are You From? You are from Neptune.

I always knew that Neptune would have it's own ring of particulate matter too, just like the other 3 gas giants in the solar system.

March: I posted some pictures today of what I've been stitching lately (Paradise Island and Venice).

Venice was a happy dance this year.

April: Traffic Cones - From an episode of Red Dwarf -The Last Day (proceeded by a snipet of script)

Another piss up story.

May: Bagpuss Goes Nightclubbing

Yes, this is the bag I wore in the nightclub. One way to get attention. Everyone kept tweaking and squeezing him.

June: I am going on a Summer Holiday...

I'm pleased as punch because after a wasted weekend of trying, I managed to book a holiday to Lanzarote this afternoon, flying out from Gatwick next Thursday.

July: Blog Update

Today I've done virtually little stitching. I've been on the computer all day, first of all doing some lessons in Fireworks MX (I've used Fireworks 3 previously, but it's well different) after the lessons I played around and made a really nice logo with Jade's face on it.

August: Stitching Blogger's Question of the Week: Stitching Quirks?

What is your most unique/interesting stitching quirk? (This could be something concerning the way you stitch, how you organize your stash, etc.)

September: August Stitching Goals - roundup

At the beginning of the month I posted my stitching goals for the month.

October: The sorting hat says: Ravenclaw

This was a Harry Potter meme. Glad I didn't make Griffindor.

November: Stitching Blogger's Question of the Week: Colour by Numbers.

Just about DMC colours and how you get to know them.

December: Stitching Blogger's Question of the Week: Stitching Rules.

How do you stitch?

"Bug"gering the bunnies! 

Well you did call me "Bugs" - what do you expect? 

Let me in... it's raining! 

Yes, it's a rabbit..... 

Yuk! 

Saddled by a muppet 

Bugs was only 6 weeks old when we took him home. 

South Park Vash

I found this link on Carol's blog, but just about everyone seems to be doing themselves as a South Park Character on their blogs, so here goes me:



Here's where you can play too: http://spstudio.elena.hosting-friends.de/spstudio.html

DAFT

This picture illustrates why older people need their driving skills continually assessed when they reach a certain age.


This happened last Saturday, it's a shame I didn't get my camera out sooner or I would have captured a fireman reversing this silly little old ladies car out of the alleyway that she'd mistakenly driven down thinking it was a road.

I came across the sight of the alleyway completely blocked by the reversing car. The fireman did a good job of getting it out though and there were only minor scratches on the bumper. I wonder if she had got it jammed in the alleyway as there was no more than about an inches clearance on either side of the car. I wonder how the fireman got in the car to drive it out? He probably had to climb in through a window.

I had to laugh when I saw the car's number plate, the three letters spelled out "DAF" Daft or what?

Stranded in the Scillies

I've just arrived back in the office from an overnighter in the Scilly Isles.

It's been a really fun, but eventful 36 hours, and best of all for the most part it was a work's outing, so it was FREE!

Our journey began yesterday morning at 8:15 with a lift to Lands End airport. The weather was very bad with drizzle, low laying cloud and fog, so the planned jaunt on the mini 8-seater Sky Bus was put on hold because of the weather. In the end we were shuttled back down into Penzance to catch the Scillonian Ferry.

The Scillionian has a very bad reputation, as a luxury cruise liner it certainly aint! In the end though, we didn't really have any choice it was the boat or no outing. Jason and Ray met us at the ferry port and we all boarded the ferry. The motion of the boat wasn't too bad. I thought it was quite funny trying to stay on my feet instead of staggering around like a drunkard. Actually the best place to stand (sitting down turned out to be worse) was right next to the bar so you could hang on to it. Hayley and the girls played cards and got progressively greener until Hayley ran to the loo and spent the majority of the rest of the voyage in there being sick. Linzi joined her too. Ray thought it was very funny to take the mickey out of their misery, until he too succumed and blew chunks too!

We arrived at midday. I think that was the thing that I hated most about the journey, not the journey itself, just the time wasted getting there. Nearly 3 hours to cruise 35 miles. Not for the first time, I really wished that I'd bought my stitching to do, but this was just supposed to be a quick jaunt on a plane followed by a pub crawl around St Mary's so I didn't think I'd have had the time to do any, so I didn't take it with me.

After leaving the port, we went to our respective B&Bs and dropped off our overnight bags, meeting back at a pub called the Bishop and Wolf for lunch. We then went on a mini pub crawl while the heavens opened up outside. When it cleared up we climbed up the top of Garrison Hill to join Phil and Bill who had hired a tennis court for the afternoon. My boss the twat decided to have a go at tennis and proceeded to play a volley all the time whilst talking on his mobile. He actually played better shots while he had it stuck to his ear than after he'd lowered it. Where's the sense in that?



Bored of Tennis, we played a game of Rounders up on the field at the top of the hill. Boys vs Girls. Of course the lads won in the end, but we did manage to draw the first game, which was a bit of a fluke. I didn't help out much in the second game, because I missed the first few rounds while squatting behind a fern having a wee. (Well we had all been drinking).

After Rounders the Girls had to buy the Boys a celebratory round and then the drinking recommenced. At least it wasn't me that was spilling the pints this time:



We were all a bit laggered by the time we sat down to our dinner at 8 in Dibble and Grub. I really enjoyed the food which was very tasty, but some of the lads complained about the lack of carbs, i.e. chips! Typical. Things started to go downhill afterthat. Phil and the twat started throwing Ice Cream around, people got a bit shirty about paying the bill so I left and went and stood outside. For one moment it looked like a fight was going to start kicking off. Ooops. My boss the twat then decided to go for a paddle, while I tried to follow Phil's example by riding a bike that was propped up against a wall outside the restaurant. I promptly fell straight off it again.

We went back to another pub, and things got a bit bleary after that, and about 10:30 I was about to pass out asleep so I went back to my B&B and zonked out. I kept my roommate awake with my snoring - apparently!

The party continued without me in the boss's B&B where they trashed the sitting room, leaving Phil passed out asleep on the floor between two half drunk four pint takeaway jugs of Cider and Lager. He wasn't even staying there! Linzi awoke Phil about 7:15 and made him go back to our B&B. He was there standing on the doorstep at 7:30 calling his roommate Bill to let him in because he didn't have a key.

Breakfast was very nice, and passed without incident, but even Bill couldn't finish his breakfast. We got a rip off skybus taxi (£3 per person) up to St Mary's Aerodrome and proceeded to wait for our flights home. But there wasn't any. The crap weather from yesterday continued, so we sat and waited for 2 hours for news of when we could return.

Eventually the Sky Bus put on an extra helicopter and we boarded this to go home, (but not all of us as there wasn't enough room). So I got to have a helicopter ride. Cool. Despite the weather it was a fun trip, just very loud.



So now, I'm sitting here at work, blogging, because I'm still hung over and can't really do a lot else. I do feel really guilty though because 5 of our party are still in St Mary's waiting for another helicopter back. We thought that they would be on the next 'copter following us. But not so. There is talk of them having to catch the 4:30 Scillonian Ferry back - I hope it doesn't come to that because two of them spewed on the way out there!

Cat Buckaroo

Cat Buckaroo is a game played with a sleeping cat. The idea stems back to the old Bucking Bronco game with the plastic horse that was popular when I was a kid in the 70s and 80s, hey, they are still probably making it today.

So the cat sits there or sleeps there while you pile things on top of him or her. I played with Jade the other day:


Of course Jade shook all the trash off, but he kept his "crown on". lol

Priscilla, Queen of the Handbag

I watched the movie "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" on Saturday:



For those that haven't heard of it, or seen it it's about 3 drag queens going on a bus tour of Oz.

Almost every boyfriend I've had in the past always refused to watch it - why? I guess they are homophobic.

Why I mention this on here is that that very evening I scored a tranny's handbag in a piece of drunken thievery at 2 am on the back stairs of a nightclub. It had to be done. I don't think he was a real transvestite, just a guy dressed in a blonde curly wig with a red and gold dress on. In fact I know that he wasn't a real tranny is that the fact that he left his handbag behind was that he'd pulled and left the nightclub with another woman.

So.... I'm sitting on the exit stairs waiting to go, and this bag is just sitting there too..... so I took it home with me. lol

Probably the most disturbing thing about it's contents - which I must now post back to him (as I've now inherited his driving licence which he probably needs) was a birthday card stuffed full of Gummy Bears saying have a good night out in drag - Love Vik!

All in all a much better haul than that damn chair leg. ;-)

Daft in Dawlish

Last week one of my friends from Kent texted me to say that she was down in Devon on holiday. So the next day I jumped on the train to go up and meet her. Despite being the next county over it's still a three hour ride, but I don't mind so much as it gives me a bit of stitching time.

It was great to meet Sue again, she met me at the station and we went back to the camping ground where she was staying with her nephew and some other friends they'd made there.



We went back into town in the afternoon to get a bite of lunch, then ended up walking into this village fete full of charity stalls. Sue started looking through some clothes that were hanging up and found a huge bra. I immediately grabbed it off her and and tried it on over my clothes in full view of the fete. I next added a large pair of knickers! lol



All the people behind the stall were having a good old laugh, but this snooty old woman walked past shaking her head and tutting, so Sue said, "You've got to try before you buy, love!". ;-)

Sue bought the bra in the end. It was only 50p. When we got back to the campsite she snuck around the back of her cousin's caravan and stuck it on her washing line.



We then sat back for Alison to get her washing in! lol Alison did swear when she saw it, but then put it back on the line after trying it out for a hat.



Then it came down to the question of who's bra it really was - which resulted in everyone trying it on for a laugh. My favourite modeller was the welshman who put the bra on and then walked the entire length of the campsite and wore it in the gents.

What the?

This was the state of the backside of my formerly white jeans this morning.

How did they get like this? I have no idea.
I obviously fell down on the dirty nightclub dance floor and possibly sat in someone's beer?

What a Root!

Spuds grow....

I found a bag of new potatoes in my cupboard. They'd been in a nice warm dark space for a few weeks and had started to sprout, this was one of the smallest in the bag - it's smaller than my thumb, but I couldn't believe the size of the sprouting root on it.

lol

Mazey's Eve Prize Collection

Well, here's my little collection of prizes from the fun fair that is down on the Promenade for Penzance's Mazey Day. Well.... apart from that chair leg... that came from a bar Called the Blue Snapper and well.... I was just sitting, chatting... and the next thing I know the chair has just collapsed and I'm sitting there pissing myself laughing on the floor in front of my boss and all of his friends! So I walked out of the bar and took the chair leg with me as a souvenier. I do these things when I'm drunk, it always seems like a good idea at the time!


Friday evening started off to be quite civilised with Hayley and me going for a meal in my bosses restaurant. He was supposed to be working there as a waiter - so we went there to give him grief and do the old "garcon, there's a fly in my soup" line. But the only "work" he did was to take our order, then got a pint for himself and sat down and joined us. After we'd eaten, his brother joined us and we started on a few cocktails and all intention of work just went out of his head! Even though the cheeky twat owns the place he still made us pay for our meals! Git!

We left the restaurant at about 9:30 and Hayley drove us up into town, the P brothers giving Hayley loads of grief about her bubble like 4x4. Hayley left us outside the Blue Snapper to drive back to Camborne and my boss introduces me to his mates as "my secretary who drinks pints"! Jees thanks mate! This was followed by the aforementioned collapsing chair incident.

We then went down Chappell Street to join the revellers outside the fair and the Navy Inn and watch the fireworks display. The Twat disappeared en route. When he turned up I asked him where he'd been and he said he'd been on the dodgems. But I walked through the fair (sober) the next day, and there was no dodgems to speak of.... was he so pissed that he was sitting on a kiddy ride believing it to be the dodgems? If only I'd got a pic of that! LOL

After the fireworks had finished we climbed over a wall to get into the back of the fair. Well the other's climbed - I sort of had to get a shove from my boss in the ass to be able to get completely over the wall, remember I'd had the quite a few cocktails and pints by this point!! Over the wall, we faced a row of portaloos "Andyloos" they were called and as this is my bosses name too - I said "well I've got to go have a pee in there, haven't I?" to his face as well. Ooops.

My boss, his brother and a mate of his then got really competitive playing games involving arrows, balls, and guns... I didn't play but I ended up with all the prizes that they won. Hence the picture above. The last prize that the twat won was one of those giant blow up hammers. He immediately used it to hit his brother with it as hard as he could and popped the bloody thing. I lost the P brothers when I went for a ride on the Carosel, and my last sight of any of them was my boss walking through the fair still carrying his deflated hammer, I called to him from the Carosel, but he didn't hear me and he was gone by the next pass, so I ended up going home on my own.

Yes, you can picture me, sitting on the Carosel riding around and around and up and down (being the only rider on the whole thing) at 12:30 am with a stupid green dinosaur hanging out of my bag because it was stuck on the zip and I was too pissed to unhook it. Embarrassment? I don't care - I had fun! - But just what do I now do with the bloody chair leg?

The Star Wars Cinema Line...

This is so cool:

http://www.jeffiscool.com/films12/Triumph_StarWarsGeeks.wmv



Ok, this is a few years old now at it's the Cinema Line for Attack of the Clones - very big download, but utterly hilarious.... and how many times does that dog drop his cigar? I guess the highlight has to be when he "leg humps" Darth Vader and then asks what button on his chest box he needs to press to call his parents. lol

Earth to Geek: Get a Life

You've gotta just LOL at this:

http://www.jeffiscool.com/numanuma.html

I guess the really sad thing is that he's doing it in front of his webcam and not in a nightclub!

The Purple Hand Gang

Is my scanner busted?

Perhaps it was having a funny five minutes, because I've just rebooted the PC and now it seems to be working fine. After trying to scan a magazine and getting a green preview image, which turned blue on the actual scan, I had a go at scanning my hand, hoping for green fingers... but this is what I got instead. How bizarre!!!